Look at what you could have won...

The editorial staff here at nota benny would like to apologise for the prolonged period of silence. In the month since the last post the schedule's just been so hectic and full of exciting things to blog about that there hasn't been any time for the words to make the leap from brain to byte.

Consequently, dear reader, you've missed pregnant ruminations on such wide and varied topics as: the BBC's credibility problems (we're waiting for the other shoe to drop when people twig that star appeal and journalistic aptitude don't necessarily go hand in glove, that Brian Conley will never entertain you, not even in the middle of the afternoon, and that the Tardis isn't actually bigger on the inside than out. And that it smells of wee.); the theory that the UK's summer weather is just one big publicity stunt for the release of Evan Almighty; an appraisal of the tea and cake served at Buckingham Palace; and the delicate nature of complimenting a father on his teenage daughter without sounding like a potential sex offender.

Any or none of these subjects may crop up in the near future.

But coming soon, an investigation showing why if visiting the woods it's Swedes not bears of whom you need to be wary.

Hold the NIBs column!

The first in an occasional series in which an award-winning journalist scratches the cheap paint job off overpriced stories to bring you the headlines other members of the Fourth Estate really wanted to publish.

Hot girl back on market
* Huge blow to noble gene pool
* "Shit or get off the pot," heir told
* Everybody else is doing it, so why don't we
* Show me the money. SHOW ME THE MONEY!!!

And yes, the BBC also covered the story in great depth. (Obligatory gallery of Kate Middleton looking fantastic here.)

NB: NIB is industry speak for News In Brief
Disclaimer: Assumptions about nature of awards made at reader's own risk. Alternative headlines not sourced from publications to which they link. Hey, can't a bloke cover his arse once in a while?