So farewell then, Joe Duirwyn, fine and noble flatmate.

The separation from your daughter finally became too much, and not even the fact that you worked in Keira Knightley's home town could keep you away from darkest Wales.

(Imbecile! You'll kick yourself when she reveals her love of musical roofers in an exclusive interview for Cosmo).

But London's loss is Lampeter's gain. Let's face it - it needs all the help it can get.

It's been a fun and interesting year, to be sure. But now it's over.

No more Tuesday Club (although its heyday went long before you). No more avid viewings of the dodgy movies that creep into the late-night TV schedules, both knowing full well it's past our bedtime. No more self-deprecating confusion about liaisons with lovely ladies. No more diet consisting solely of pizza, easy-cook noodles, ice cream, tortillas and taramasalata. And no more having to put up with the likes of them distracting you from far more important things while walking the streets of west London.

When you moved in, I was really just accommodating another of Thomas's friends. When you moved out, I lost one of my best mates to this metropolitan horror.

I'll miss your music, your liveliness, your language, your constantly evolving hair, and plenty more things I haven't even realised yet.

But I won't miss your feet.

Come back soon and often.

Hawddamor, chyfaill. Dangnefedd, cariad ac noeth arglwyddesau beunydd.